Because I’m a single guy, when I go to the supermarket I can usually get away with jumping in the “15 Items or Less” line. And I have to admit, while there’s a number of things that get under my skin rather quickly, I’m pretty tolerant of people who get into the zippier checkout line with a few more items than the stated limit. I’m good at, say, the limit plus five items or so. Even when it’s over that, I’ll usually just suck it up and deal.
Well, tonight I jumped into the fast line with a maybe six items while tinkering with my cell phone. When I looked up from what I was doing, I realized that the woman in front of me had a shopping cart loaded up with a week’s worth of groceries for a family of perhaps six to eight. The line behind me had already gotten pretty long and after some contemplation, I decided to point out her “mistake”.
I tapped the woman on the shoulder, she turned to look at me, and I pointed at the sign stating “15 Items of Less.” She looked at the sign, looked back at me, went completely blank and motionless, and blinked.
And blinked again.
And again…
And yet again…
After about twenty seconds of this, I said, “This isn’t Jurassic Park. I can still see you when you stop moving.”
Annoyed she responded, “Well, I don’t know what you want me to do.”
After waiting a moment to both think this through and give her a chance to stop being an ass, I replied, “Well, you’re in the ’15-items-or-less’ line with a carriage that has enough food in it to feed a family in Somalia for over a year. Isn’t it obvious? I expect you to strip down and dance the cha-cha…”
Now she stared at me like I just stuffed an uncooked smelt up her nose.
“…OR you can do the courteous thing and wheel your carriage to the appropriate line. You know, like everyone else in the store. It’s up to you. You have options.”
She reacted poorly, but she did get out of the express line.
Bloody hell…
